irony rules

Ahimsa aside, if you do not see the irony in this you need one tight slap and told to snap out of it.

A yoga teacher friend sent me this basically asking “what the what?!?” This was in an email she received from Yoga Journal Online.

“Find personal yoga teachers expensive?”

Say what? Uh, thanks, Yoga Journal (and yes, I know it’s not Yoga Journal specifically but the advertiser), but does it really benefit all the yoga teachers out there for your advertiser to put the idea into peoples’ heads that private teachers are too expensive?

HELLO!! I’m trying to GET more private students, not drive them away! Thanks for nothing.

“Private yoga lessons directly from India”

Hmmmm….let’s see. I call Dell and get to talk to someone in Mumbai. Same with American Express.

Now we’re outsourcing yoga classes to India!

Forget the gym, forget the yoga studio, forget the private teacher. I will get on my computer and gosh darn it all to hell I can get a real authentic Indian to teach me some yoga.

Woo-hoo! No more stinky studio mats and gross toenails on the floor! No more people coming in late and leaving early! No more cell phones ringing in class! I’m just gonna order me up some yoga in the privacy of my bedroom! YAY! Who needs to interact with teachers face to face, I can shut it down and get a pizza in the middle of the class…now THAT’S a slice of yoga heaven!

And to think I made four trips to India and paid all that money to KYM…..what an idiot!

Click the ad and it will take you to Divine Wellness where you can sign up for a free private yoga lesson so knock yourself out:

“Private Yoga Lesson is conducted online using web camera. You get the same experience as a teacher guiding you step-by-step and continuously modifying the program as per your readiness. Only the teacher is across the internet. Even better, our qualified and experienced teachers are in India, the land of origin of Yoga.”

I like the “even better” part because yes, the most “qualified and experienced teachers are in India.” The next best thing is teachers who train in India and that’s me. So call me! I need more private clients. Will yoga for food, rates negotiable.

Go ahead. Get your free lesson and let me know how much they charge. Then I will tell you how much private yoga classes REALLY are in India. I’m rolling my eyes now.

If I had a webcam I would get that free trial and report back, but, hell…I don’t even own an IPod.

Wait a minute….why didn’t I think of this?

DOH! I need one tight slap.

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the ups and downs of teaching and why common sense ain’t too common

“Repeated frustrations and disappointments, Sama, are always a reflection of repeated misunderstandings and presumptions. Oh, darn.” – The Universe

Some of the most frequent search phrases for this blog are about “teaching yoga” or “how much does a yoga teacher make” or “I want to teach yoga.” I’ve written before about the trials and tribulations about teaching for yoga studio owners, so this is another taste of what real life yoga teaching is all about. Gather ’round, children.

Besides teaching privately, I also teach at two community colleges and rent a room at a massage therapy business. I will be gone for two months next year so I needed to get subs for my classes. The two colleges are covered and the persons in charge of my classes are very thankful that I did not leave them in the lurch; both wished me well and told me they would welcome me back, no problem. In fact one woman told me that I was the best yoga teacher they could ever have….sigh (hug.)

Some of you may recall my misadventure with a young studio owner which prompted me to find the room that I rent. I started teaching in this space in January and the dedicated yin students followed me there from the studio.

As a renter I am under no delusion that I will be there forever. You rent at the whim of the landlord. It seemed like a great fit since the owner does massage, reiki, has meditation classes, etc.

When I started using his space the first thing I did was invite him to my class on Sunday mornings to experience what yin yoga is all about and to learn more about me. I thought he would be all into it considering he is a massage therapist and teaches meditation classes (in other words, he talks the talk.) He never did.

I told him that I study yoga therapy at one of the leading yoga schools in the world, so I encouraged him to suggest yoga therapy to his clients. I encouraged him to promote the fact that he had a highly trained yoga teacher working out of his space and it could be a win-win situation for both of us. The situation that I describe can really be the best of both worlds for a yoga teacher and a holistic practice if there is communication and give and take between the parties. During the year I also suggested different workshops but he never showed any interest. I am the only yoga in this small town, which will soon have no yoga. A big fish in a little pond with lots of room for growth. Unfortunately, as much as I would like to have my own meditation center that offers yoga (instead of the other way around), I can not afford to rent a space large enough to do this.

I said that I would be gone for two months and asked whether it would be OK to continue the classes (my students were already worried about what would happen to the classes) with my friend subbing. After all, it’s not my place, so I teach there at his whim. I asked three times about it and I never received a response. I finally received this email:

“When Metta-Yoga started at the Center, I was thinking about it more from the perspective that it would be of benefit to some of the Center clients. So far, it doesn’t seem like there has been very many that have taken up on the opportunity. The additional exposure would have been nice too, but as far as I can tell, there have only been one or two students who have sought sessions. Also, I need to start teaching classes on Saturday and Sunday days which would end up conflicting with the class room use on Sunday. From a philosophical perspective, I am slightly more comfortable referring clients to a style of Yoga such as Svaroopa as it is more spinal and joint opening then core strengthening. I think a restorative / repairative style would be more attractive to some of my older, chronically impaired clients who have spinal & joint issues. Therefore, I am thinking that at the end of the year we should end the use of the space for the classes you are teaching.”

Now let me break down this email for you, kids….

1. Other than being mentioned on the center’s website, to my knowledge my sessions were never advertised to their database, so how would his clients know what I offer and take advantage of it? I always asked whether my new sessions would be announced and I never received any response. In fact, I used to teach two classes and had to drop one because of lack of attendance. I also could not depend on coverage in the local paper — the editor told me my press release could always be superseded by an announcement for let’s say…a hog calling contest. ahem.

2. As for needing to use the room, I understand that, it’s his space.

3. My students did not utilize his services, which is too bad, but I could not help that.

4. But as for the part in bold….HUH?!?

Like I said, even after more than a few invitations the owner never came to my class (which he could have taken for free!) or ever asked me what I teach or how I teach, so he had no basis for making that statement. Yin yoga is “core strengthening”? Whaaaat?

As for Svaroopa yoga, I started becoming suspicious when I saw cards for a Svaroopa yoga teacher next to my cards on the front desk. Hmmmmmm, I thought, what’s that all about? I know nothing about that style of yoga, only that it uses chairs and lots of props and is considered restorative. But my point is: the owner never made any attempt to learn what I do or what I can offer.

“Spinal and joint opening”? This was my response to that:

“I do not teach a style of yoga that is “core strengthening.” I invited you a number of times to come experience yin yoga, but you never did.

All yoga is “spinal and joint opening” just as all yoga is therapeutic if applied in the right manner. In fact, the style of yin yoga is not only practiced by senior citizens with limited mobility, but is also used in addiction and trauma recovery programs. The concept of “yin” means that it is “still” as opposed to “yang” or moving.”

Common sense tells me that if I, a holistic practitioner, was renting space to a yoga teacher with my training in yoga, yoga therapy, meditation, and energy work, that I would want to take advantage of that and work with that person to grow both our businesses. He would have been the only alternative therapy business for miles around to offer yoga therapy. As my friend who was going to sub for me told me, his loss. But common sense ain’t too common anymore. What was I thinking?!?

Don’t kid yourselves. As much as we yoga teachers like to think that yoga has gone mainstream, that people will be rushing to yoga therapy, or that other holistic practitioners will knock down your doors begging for your services…think again.

So let this be a lesson for you, children, on the ups and down of yoga teaching. But am I upset? Actually I’m not. For some reason that I have yet to figure out, I am relieved. Sure it was a nice chunk of change every 6-8 weeks, but the energy was off. When I offer my services to someone and say let’s work together, and I am not respected and worse, underestimated, it’s time to get the hell out.

This yoga business journey has shown me time and time again to do my own thing and don’t count on (and never completely trust) anyone but me. The words of my astrologer keep ringing in my ears: find my own tribe.

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it truly IS the Kali Yuga

The Kali Yuga: the “Dark Age” lasting 432,000 years…when avarice and wrath are common, rulers become unreasonable, cowards have the reputation of bravery and the brave are called cowards…and lies are passed out as truth.

“In the age of Kali, every virtue had been engulfed by the sins of Kali-Yuga; all good books had disappeared; impostors had promulgated a number of creeds which they had invented out of their own wit. The people had all fallen prey to delusion and all pious acts had been swallowed by greed….

In the age of Kali duplicity, perversity, hypocrisy, malice, heresy, pride, infatuation, concupiscence and arrogance etc. pervade the whole universe….

In the age of Kali there is no contentment, nor discernment, nor composure…Envy, harsh words and covetousness are rampant; while evenness of mind is absent….

Self-control, charity, compassion and wisdom disappear while stupidity and fraud multiply to a large extent. Men and women all pamper their body; while slanderers are diffused all over the world….”
(excerpts from the Tulsi Ramayana.)

As roseanne wrote, it sure does seem like the end of yoga as we know it….

I saw this over at YogaDork and shook my head. Just when you thought the commercialization of American Yoga couldn’t get any worse, eh?

Everything eventually comes full circle. I used to be a fitness instructor and saw things come and go. Is that tai-bo guy still around?

This is why I say the “new yogi” will be a “radical yoga traditionalist.”** Two teachers I consider radical traditional yogis are Paul Grilley and Mark Whitwell (uh, and me, too, because like Paul I’m a traditionalist but don’t mind killing yoga’s sacred cows on occasion.)

Yup, Playboy Yoga, no chanting and no Sanskrit for sure (but does she eat granola?). No clothes either, because you can download her naked yoga (which will be a boon for everyone who searches for “naked yoga” and hits on this blog post so knock yourself out.)

Talk amongst yourselves.

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**“radical yoga traditionalist” concept originating here, comment #6. if that inspires you, then please give credit where credit is due. or else I’m calling Bikram’s lawyer regarding copyright.


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dog face down

This is why my friends in India ask me whether I teach “real yoga” or “American yoga.”

Bonding With Their Downward-Facing Humans

“….Call it a yogic twist: Downward-facing dog is no longer just for humans.

Ludicrous? Possibly. Grist for anyone who thinks that dog-owners have taken yoga too far? Perhaps. But nationwide, classes of doga — yoga with dogs, as it is called — are increasing in number and popularity. Since Ms. Caliendo, a certified yoga instructor in Chicago, began to teach doga less than one year ago, her classes have doubled in size.

Not everyone in the yoga community is comfortable with this.

“Doga runs the risk of trivializing yoga by turning a 2,500-year-old practice into a fad,” said Julie Lawrence, 60, a yoga instructor and studio owner in Portland, Ore. “To live in harmony with all beings, including dogs, is a truly yogic principle. But yoga class may not be the most appropriate way to express this….”

Dog Face Down is what one of my students called Downward Facing Dog.

I feel sorry for the spaniel in the middle — he looks scared and his owner looks a bit intense. Put that dog down and step away from the mat, lady!

Can you do this with your Great Dane? The mind reels.

ARF.

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